Die A Little More Podcast
A podcast for the everyday man who loves Jesus, and is in the fight of his life for his family, friends and himself.
Die A Little More Podcast
Truck Talk: Two Guys, Coffee, and Kingdom Truth
Have you ever felt exhausted trying to live up to all of God's standards on your own strength? There's a profound freedom waiting when we discover the true power of the gospel.
In this raw, unfiltered conversation from the front seat of a work truck, we unpack a revolutionary truth from Romans 8 that changes everything: "Every righteous requirement of the law can be fulfilled through the anointed one living his life in us." This isn't just theological theory—it's practical liberation that transforms how we handle daily challenges from work stress to family leadership.
We share personal stories about learning to respond rather than react, catching ourselves in moments of negativity, and discovering what true biblical leadership looks like. For men especially, we explore how cultural expectations of independence clash with God's design for interdependence and spiritual vulnerability. There's something powerful that happens when we give trusted brothers permission to "call us on our BS" and speak truth into our blind spots.
The conversation goes deep into what authentic brotherhood looks like—not just surface-level friendship, but the kind where difficult conversations happen, wounds sometimes occur, and healing follows. We talk candidly about times we've hurt each other, apologized, and grown stronger through the process. In a world where men often struggle in isolation, this kind of brotherhood becomes essential for spiritual growth.
Whether you're wrestling with negative thought patterns, struggling to lead your family well, or simply wanting deeper connections with other believers, this episode offers practical wisdom for surrendering control to the Holy Spirit and allowing Christ to live through you. Join us in discovering what it means to truly "die a little more" to ourselves so Christ can live more fully through us.
Wait. So instead of me having to fulfill the law, if I just of. The gospel is so good that it's like he is the one who's going to live out the righteous life in us, and then I love this and now we're free to live. It's almost like, bro, just go live Yo here, we go. Hey, hey, what's up, brother? Good morning, good morning everyone. Welcome to the Die A Little More podcast. I'm glad to be here and sitting in the truck early morning coffee.
Speaker 2:Ready Coffee. Ready to go. Ready to go Ready to go.
Speaker 1:My daughter. I was just talking to her on the phone.
Speaker 2:She's like where do you do?
Speaker 1:the podcast. I was like in a Starbucks parking lot In the work truck In the work truck.
Speaker 2:Hey, actually Chevy did a solid dude. This thing is actually pretty airtight.
Speaker 1:I know yeah.
Speaker 2:Pretty surprising.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:We don't have a million-dollar studio, we have a truck that's not even ours. Well, you know just borrowing it.
Speaker 1:But yeah, you're right. I have found that it is like a car is a pretty amazing sound studio, because it edits out so much sound and it's quiet, unless you have a crazy homeless person knocking on your window.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you just got to be careful where you're parking.
Speaker 1:Yeah, or somebody's in front of you and they're like parking and they're a bad parker and you're just like watching them and you just get totally distracted because you're pretty sure they're going to hit that car over there are the ones that walk by that just randomly decide they're going to stare at you and look at you weird, because, like they're, what are you doing?
Speaker 2:yeah?
Speaker 1:yeah, I've seen that a couple times. I'm like I can't look at those people. Do not make eye contact because they're like you're weird. What are you doing in that car with microphones and a dude?
Speaker 2:Don't ask any questions.
Speaker 1:We're like you don't even know anything about it, just keep walking, oh man.
Speaker 2:Got to get it all out of the system.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we got to shake it free. It's like doing that shake your arms out and your legs out before you work out yeah, we're in a really good mood today.
Speaker 2:We've got a lot of good stuff going on and we've got the podcast we're gonna do right now. Yep, we've got work today, which will be great oh yeah and then we've got a christian metal concert to go to this evening.
Speaker 1:It's like the best day ever. It's like the best day ever.
Speaker 2:It's like the best day ever, except for teenagers all over again. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. I mean the Lord says like if you're going to enter the kingdom, you got to do it like a child, right, right? So, what's up?
Speaker 2:Like a child, give me my or childish. No, like a child.
Speaker 1:Childish, I tried that one. It doesn't work the same. Lots of complaining and crying. Are we there yet?
Speaker 2:She's never ended up, good, are we? There yet. God.
Speaker 1:Jeez, this is taking forever. I don't like these vegetables.
Speaker 2:That's so funny.
Speaker 1:I know I'm supposed to eat this but it doesn't taste good.
Speaker 2:It has been a minute. Oh man, it's hilarious.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know if you want to talk about this, but, like yesterday, you were talking about work and you brought up work today and it was cool what you said, because you were like we got work and it's going to be good. Like I heard you say that and it reminded me of the conversation we were having yesterday about just staying positive with work and oh, yeah, yeah, it's um I I think we always are bent slightly me more so than others just just on the negative train.
Speaker 2:You know, and it's. Things are happening. You're immediately your first thought is something negative, or you have some kind of backhanded comment or something under your breath, or you complain and get upset and get angry and allow yourself to be moved to this place that you know. It's like you, I'm realizing, it's like hey, like you have control of that, you can decide how you're going to react to that. Right, and just lately the lord has just been working on me and I'm trying to see things a little bit differently and just chill out and relax and realize that not everything is like a life and death situation right, yeah how to have more grace in situations, you know, where things don't go the way I expected them.
Speaker 2:You know, and yesterday we were talking a little bit about that and just me learning how to react differently and how that is changing the way that I am for that moment and for the rest of the day as well.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, like one moment of like jumping off the cliff of anger or whatever like can really set like the whole day off. You know, and like almost every other, you know relationship, every other connection we have with people, yeah, Because usually it's without the parachute. Right, we splat at the bottom. Everybody's coming with us, by the way, we're going to take everybody down.
Speaker 2:It's a wily coyote dude. No parachute Full on Right over the side of the cliff.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and I think I said to you I mean, I struggle with the same thing. I can be. It's like my bent is towards negativity and, man, I really have to like think about it and work on it, um, just because I yeah, that's like it's my bent, it's my nature, but, um, we were saying yesterday, like, but it's not like the way we're supposed to think. You know. So, even if that is the way I am, you know, um, you know we're supposed to be having a renewing of the mind or we're supposed to be like walking in the kingdom, right, and and the kingdom. When Jesus talks about the kingdom, it's, it's not about, it's not like that, it's like, uh, and it's something that we've said before on the podcast it's about like believing the words that the Lord has said. You know like, I have good plans for you, you know, um, and in those moments, where it doesn't look good, we're supposed to still hang on to those um promises.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, that's really, that's really hard. That's been a really hard lesson for me, cause it's it is my default. You know, a lot of it is environment.
Speaker 2:I think I said yesterday I need to stop being lazy in my emotions and really just take control and take charge and realize that, hey, I'm the one that's in charge of these and I can determine how I'm going to react to a situation. And you know, and, and I think reading, reading the word and allowing the Lord to work on you is a big factor in that, just refining, you know my personality and and how I, how I interact with people and react with everything. So it's been, it's been sort of cool yeah so verb is just changing a little bit.
Speaker 2:When I'm talking, I notice I'm thinking a little bit differently and responding differently.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, that's cool man, I see it in you. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's cool. I was thinking like I've heard people say like when something happens, you can't just go to like the worst version of yourself, right, but that's our default, you know because, but that's our default, you know. And it's like maybe like when we were younger or before we were saved. It's like something bad happens and you just swing at some dude, right, like that's just your thing, and now that we're older and like a little bit more, we've grown a little bit more, it's like we don't do that anymore, but this is something that we always talk about. It's like the Lord continues to like peel the onion with us. You know, it's like I used to punch a dude and now I don't anymore, so like I'm way better. But the Lord's like, hmm, like you know, like you are, you are, but like it's now it's gone into. Instead of like physical things, it's, it's like spiritual, um ways of thinking.
Speaker 2:You know, it's your emotions that he's dealing with and I think I think I said to you yesterday it's your emotions, yeah, that he's dealing with, and I think I think I said to you yesterday it's it's, it is learned behavior. I mean not not to use that as a get out of jail free card to absolve herself from any kind of responsibility from ourselves, but I mean that's how society is and I think that's where the laziness comes in, where it's just really easy to be like, well, that's what everybody else is doing yeah right, yeah, I mean, everybody else is acting that way.
Speaker 2:This is how everyone I know reacts to these situations and stuff, and so you just flip on the lazy switch and you're like, okay, well, that's just the way it's going to be, because it's really easy for me just to do something without thinking about it right, right yeah but if I want to be in control of, like my reactions and be responsible and mature, you know, and then I need to take a second and I need to look how I should respond to a situation.
Speaker 2:I think we've even talked about that a few times in some of the episodes too, where it's like it's it's learning to respond and not react in situations yeah yeah, yeah, my counselor says that a lot, you know.
Speaker 1:He's like um, you know, sometimes we're not like emotionally mature enough to like respond well, you know. So we react right. And it's funny I mean, I think I'm growing in that too and it's crazy because the react comes out immediately, without even thinking, you know, and I can think of a situation just this last week where I said something and I was like, oh, shoot, like it came out too fast, and then I was like, wait, stop, that's not what I meant. Um, this is what I mean, you know, or this is how I feel you know. Um, so being able to recognize it is huge.
Speaker 2:Well, that's good too, though I mean, cause it's a lot of the times it just happens and we're so caught up in the moment, emotionally or whatever it we don't even ever stop to catch ourselves. So I mean, if you're dealing with somebody on a regular basis that sees you react on an on the norm right yeah then seeing you catch yourself, oh man, shoot. I'm so sorry. That's not what I meant. That's not my intention. Here's what I really meant to say yeah, this is how I really feel about this situation.
Speaker 2:I mean, that actually is should be good news to them too. Yeah, Because they're like oh wow, you caught that Right. Right, Instead of just doubling down and just when you know, then I would have what I was going to have as a reaction, Right, you went ahead and just apologized and were like like that's not what I meant yeah, yeah yeah, and I think that that does go a long way because the the other person sees like, hey, you're not doing the thing that you always do right you know and they can see that the lord's working in you right
Speaker 1:yeah, and that goes a long way. Yeah, you know, instead of just bulldozing like we always do, you know, yeah, I was saying yesterday, when we were talking about this too, um, it reminds me that you know the verse in romans. It says do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world. And I was saying to you, like the pattern of this world is like react, you know, and like, well, you said this, so I'm gonna say this back because that's what we do and that is a pattern of this world, right, but it's not the kingdom, like it's not how Jesus would love somebody, but it is how the world does it. And so if I'm like, well, sorry, this is just the way I am, and I this is the way everybody does it.
Speaker 1:What did you say? You said if I, if you're saying to yourself this is the way everybody does it, it's like a red flag you know, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're already in trouble right because you know that's the way the masses are doing it, right, right yeah, which is not the way we're supposed to be doing it, right yeah?
Speaker 2:that's good stuff. That's really. I think it's really important. I mean, it's making these little changes and these little alterations. I am, you know, as long as we've been doing the podcast now, which hasn't been too long. But you know, in our other conversations we have on the side. It's sort of like now when we talk about it later. You know, I can, I can step back and take a look at it and sort of be like, wow, you know, that's like we have, have, we have. We actually have grown quite a bit to where we're catching things and trying to change. You know, it's not just talking about them because we're we're in the process.
Speaker 2:You can actually see now there's some fruit yeah from that I know right where you've made some progress in that. So it's pretty, it's pretty cool right, like seriously.
Speaker 1:I mean I'm not joking, but it's like yeah, yay yay for us. I mean, it's like I think we're both growing, you know, and that's like, yeah, it is amazing and yeah and it's okay to celebrate.
Speaker 2:I mean exactly, exactly totally you know there's, there's, yeah, there's so many things that get you down in life and so many things that we, you know there's problems everywhere right now. So it's like celebrate the little victories, you know, while you can, totally you know, as's problems everywhere right now.
Speaker 1:So it's like celebrate the little victories you know while you can, totally you know, as an encouragement yeah, right, and it's like really, it's like thank you, lord, that like you've opened up my eyes to this thing and that you've empowered me to start changing. Yeah, you know, and I'm not like I used to be yeah, yeah yeah, huge, yeah, so what you've got today well, actually it's cool.
Speaker 1:I was reading this this morning in Romans and it kind of talks about what we're talking about. I don't know where to start, but like At the beginning, at the beginning, all right, well, I'll read for just a little bit and then I'll jump into the thing that I was going to, that I wanted to talk about. So this is in Romans, you know, at the end of Romans 7, it says I give all my thanks to God, for his mighty power has finally provided a way out through our Lord Jesus, the anointed one. So if left to myself, the flesh is aligned with the law of sin. So if left to myself, the flesh is aligned with the law of sin. And now my renewed mind. And now, oh sorry, but now my renewed mind is fixed on and submitted to God's righteousness. And that caught my eye because I've been focused on, like, the renewing of the mind. I was like, oh, it says it right there. And then yeah, and then so keep going, yeah, and then so keep going. Verse chapter eight says so.
Speaker 1:Now the case is closed. There remains no accusing voice of condemnation against those who are joined in life union with Jesus, the anointed one For the law. In quotation marks of the spirit of life flowing through the anointing. The anointing of Jesus has liberated us from the law of sin and death. And I was like, oh, that's cool. It's like there's a new law. You know, there was like the law of sin and death and now there's a new law of being liberated through Jesus. Okay, okay, this is the cool part. I mean all of it's cool, but this was the part that got me this morning.
Speaker 1:So now every righteous requirement of the law can be fulfilled through the anointed one living his life in us. And I was like, wait, so instead of me having to fulfill the law, if I just release myself to the Lord, to the control of the Holy Spirit? It says every righteous requirement of the law can be fulfilled through the anointed one, through Jesus living his life in us. And I was like, so it's not even about me having to do anything Like, literally, the God, the new, the good news of the gospel is so good that it's like he is the one right, he is the one who's going to live out the righteous life in us.
Speaker 1:And then I love this too. And now we're free to live. It's almost, bro, just go live, because the, the holy anointed one, is going to live out righteousness in us. So it says now we are free to live not according to our flesh but by the dynamic power of the holy spirit. And I was just like it kind of brings me relief when I read that verse, because I just really like that it says so now every righteous requirement of the law can be fulfilled through the anointed one living his life in us.
Speaker 2:So I'm going to double down on that. John, chapter 15, verses four. So you must remain in life union with me, for I remain in life union with you, for as a branch severed from the vine will not bear fruit, so your life will be fruitless unless you live your life intimately joined to mine, mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm yeah.
Speaker 2:So good, well, apart from me, you can do nothing. I mean, we can keep going and keep going. But it's like you know. Those two verses right there, dude, are more than enough to know. It's like it is christ in me, the hope of glory yeah, yeah, yeah the holy spirit resided in us.
Speaker 2:Same power that raised christ jesus from the dead resides in our mortal body, right? So it's like that. That is the empowerment, right? Because what does jesus say later in in? I can't remember if it's john 17 or it's between 15 and 17, or he's like like I am in the father and he is in me, right, as I am in you and you are in me right it's, it's, it's almost like it's, it's not, not, not the trinity thing, don't get me wrong.
Speaker 2:I don't want to have the heresy. Please get my phone number and track me down but it's it. There's this, there's this union that's supposed to happen between all of us, right, right, like he, he, they have the father, the son, the holy spirit, right, but now it's like they're wanting to include us within that too, in that cycle, right, right, where it's all of us, in all of us. Right, we're supposed to be operating in unison, together. Yeah, right, yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, what I was seeing in this verse is like it's super encouraging because it's like it sounds like what it's saying is, if we give control to the Holy Spirit, he'll live the life that he wants through us. Basically, I guess the way I see that is like okay, lord, what do you want to do today? Right, I just like. I surrendered myself in letting him lead, and the cool thing is it says that he fulfills all of our righteous requirements that way, by letting him lead. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well why? Because they said that Jesus says when I go away there'll come another right. He's the helper. Yeah. Right. Well, we can't fulfill. The Bible says multiple times we can't, we couldn't. There's nothing we could do to fulfill the law. Dude.
Speaker 1:Right. Yeah, nothing yeah.
Speaker 1:Apart from Christ and apart from the holy spirit do there's nothing that we can do to fulfill the law. You know it's funny. I know I saw this too this morning and I read it already. But it's sort of crazy because it says, uh, for god achieved so through jesus what the law was unable to accomplish. So I was like, oh, the law wasn't good enough. But then it says because the law was limited by me. Basically it says the law was limited because of the weakness of humans. So the law is perfect, but the problem with it was us. We ruined it, we tanked it, you know?
Speaker 1:Yeah, but he fulfilled it through his son.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So cool. Well, it just shows that we don't have the power to do things in our own strength. Right, I mean we're disillusioned at best.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Right Like oh, I got this. No, you don't Right.
Speaker 1:Not even close. Not even close yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know, not even close. Yeah, yeah, you know.
Speaker 2:I mean obviously some things it's like we've learned how to do and they're simple, simple tasks, and I'm talking like keeping it in context of what we're talking about here is like yeah, when it talks about our nature and our life, living our life and living for the lord, being able to change or follow, you know the instructions that he lays out before us. You know, it's almost as like you know that the thing everybody says it's like well, I'm a good person. Yeah, I'm a good person, right, like well, are you?
Speaker 1:yeah, it really depends on what your, uh, what your grade is.
Speaker 2:Right, well, right well, I'm just saying, though, it's like our, our ability because I mean that you're a good person to know it's that you're in control of yourself and being able to control your mind right will your emotions and all of that right and it's like that's just not going to happen right, when you usually like a person is saying that too, like right after they got arrested.
Speaker 1:They're like whoa bro, you're taking me to like I'm a good person, I'm a good person, I'm a good person. You don't know me, I'm a good person, which is a joke, but it's kind of like that's generally when I want to pop that one out, and when I'm a good person is like right after I just did something like it's kind of making me look like I'm not a good person.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, but that's funny. But yeah, there's a beauty though of like realizing, though, like I don't know, you know beauty in the dependence part.
Speaker 2:Yeah, upon the lord right, exactly, exactly yeah, where it's like, it's not. I think, as guys dude, this is something that's harder for us, but it's not. It's not us showing weakness, right? I mean I, I I've got to think of, like you know, let's get as manly as we can here, like army, rangers, navy seals, people like that, right, it's you know, swat team, something like that that requires men to work together.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Right, and so we were so fiercely independent, because that's the way society like rears us as we're growing up, right. But to be able to put your own feelings and thoughts aside and to be able to learn how to trust a teammate, yeah right with your life, ultimately, you know I've got to trust you. I've got to follow you literally. Sometimes I got to follow behind you wherever we're going and I got to trust that you're leading me in the right direction yeah right having my best and my protection always in your mind. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Right and then release that. But the guy behind you is thinking the same thing. Yeah. Right. Yeah. And I think that's a good picture for us, even within the church context, of the church and it's like what are we doing? It's like all of us are running around most places, dude, and most churches, all independent of each other. There's, there's no community. I know this is something that's been on our heart for for a while. Dude is trying to even this podcast was to develop a community, yeah, for specifically men.
Speaker 2:You know the things that we talk about on this podcast, or it can be for anyone, but it's specifically geared towards, towards men, right? Yeah and it's like that was the aim of our heart was to create something, to start building a community and see where god was going to take it yeah because nobody's talking about these things right nobody's talking about us trusting each other.
Speaker 2:Nobody's talking about us trusting him changing our lives, changing our hearts, you know, being better for our families. Like nobody's really digging into these things and talking about them from a Christian perspective. Yeah. Right, there's a lot of self-help, there's a lot of like you can do it and all of that, but that's none of that. Apart from Christ, it's nothing.
Speaker 1:Right yeah.
Speaker 2:And you may have some traction and you may have some positive things happen.
Speaker 1:But for it to last, you can't. There's no way to sustain it. Yeah, yeah, and I think we want to bring in like the jesus aspect of it too. Right, like there's all. There are good podcasts that help us to develop, as, like I don't know, you know business people and you know like self-help stuff, but like, but ultimately we know we're like all that stuff fails at some point.
Speaker 1:And there, yeah, we want to be able to talk about that part past that where there is having to depend on the Lord and even, yeah, needing to depend on brothers you know, who are like bro. I got to tell you like this, because this is what's going on and I need help and I need you to stand with me, you know, in the fire here, and pray on behalf of me and my family, or whatever you know, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think it's like I don't know, maybe everybody in every generation says this, but it feels like desperate times for men to come into more health.
Speaker 2:You know, it's like we're needed more than ever well, I mean you can just take one one look at what's going on in the news. You know not to get too far off the subject, but I mean you've got the encouragement for men to play women's sports, and you know, and for men to become women, and you know, and for women to leave their homes instead of men, and yeah, things like that. And it's like there's a specific pattern and way that that god set it up, where we're a husband and a wife working unison together.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean, but the husband ultimately leads yeah that's the position that he created for him yeah you know, and I, part of me thinks that because men have resigned from that leadership, the women have taken that up and a lot of the times it has gotten distorted right from what it should be or twisted. But I think that's why a lot of? Times you see women taking the forefront in things because the guys aren't willing to rise up and do that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh man, this is a tree I don't know, aren't willing to rise up and do that. Yeah, oh man, this is a tree. I don't know if I want to bark up, but I've thought about this a lot and I think that, um, yeah, I think men are under attack because the enemy wants to, like decompose the structure right, and I think it's been for a while, and I even think it started like a long, like quite a while ago with like, oh man, uh, like with like doors already been kicked.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I might as well just run through it.
Speaker 1:With, like, like, and I think that this is a satanic, demonic attack of the structure, of the way it's supposed to be. But like with like, um, women's like, uh, liberation, like women's right stuff, like like getting out of control and kind of being led by like people who are like you know, I don't know very worldly. It's like the structure has gotten corroded and like men are now like pushed down, or men have reside, or like bowed out. You know, um, and also, I mean, I heard somebody so in Genesis, where after Adam and Eve sinned, you know, I heard somebody interpret this one time as like um, adam had to then go to work, you know, and Eve will have pain in her childbirth, and and then there's that line that says, and her desire would be for her husband, like, or something like that, but I I've heard it said that the translation is her desire would be for her husband's position of leadership, like she would want to rule over him, like it was like it was part of the twist, part of it's part of the fall.
Speaker 1:That's interesting, yeah, and I think in our society, I think men have been downplayed as like, oh, men are big dopes and fools and they don't really know how to.
Speaker 1:You know, even on TV, right, the dad is always dumb, right, it's like there's, I mean, dude, the model is this there's always some beautiful lady who's got all of her stuff together and then some ding-dong dad, right, that's the model, like that we all see, even that's like demonic, it's like that's saying like the dad isn't important, you know, right, and it's just's all of it is like that slight of hands, demonic, like taste, you know like, of putting men down. And and I think what you and me are like really wanting to do is, is and just is to say, like we recognize that and let's, let's try to like put this back in order, like, you know like, because if the model is the father, christ, uh, you know like, and then christ, right, so, like we, we are, we are like the head of the household we're supposed to be like like, you know what I mean the image of god to our family, um, and if we're not, then the whole thing is out of order, right?
Speaker 2:You talk to one wife that has a husband that's leading the home, that's going to church, leading the family, right working, providing and doing all the things right you're supposed to do. You talk to that wife and ask her if she's mad and feels like he's suppressing her Right, right, if he's like, if she feels demeaned because she knows that she should be in charge, or whatever the case is. Whatever the rhetoric is dude right.
Speaker 2:Like she will look at you and have a list of things to say. Right, and I've been reminded of this recently. This is why I love like Father's Day and you know other days like that, because it's a chance. You know it's like Mother's Day or anything like that. You get a chance to say a lot of things that you wish you would have said all year, right yeah and it's like it's that that kind of day, right.
Speaker 2:So it's like you just, you just know that it's like, hey, I'm gonna put my thoughts down in my, my heart down and in a card or something like that, right, but it's like you know my wife is really good at doing this where she'll send me these things on like, like instagram or facebook or you know. Father's day I'll get a card that says says it all, but it's like.
Speaker 2:It's like thank you for leading our home, thank you for praying for our family yeah thank you for providing for us, for leading our children, for, for pouring into your children, you know, because you can see that they all love the lord right. And it goes down this list of things, dude, and it's like and it always brings tears to my eyes, and because it's like we don't we often, as men, we don't think about that, we just get stuck in work mode and we just lead, lead, lead, lead, lead yeah and we don't often look back to see the fruit yeah of what we're leaving as a legacy, because we're so caught up with everything that's going on in life and I think these times offer us a unique ability to look back, and it's like you can talk to those wives that have men or husbands that are leading like that.
Speaker 2:They don't want their spot. Yeah, right Because they know that they're operating in the fullness of what they're supposed to operate, and so they're able to relax and be who they are called to be, according to Christ. Right Biblically yeah.
Speaker 2:Right and rear the children pour into them, teach them, love them, connect with them. Right and rear the children pour into them, teach them, love them, connect with them Right, pray with them. And the husband has his area that he does fully yeah. Right, but I think that also is that's what you're talking about. That's what's under attack. Yeah, right, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I think it's the reminding, you know, and we can do the same thing for our wives, because they do need it, but just like we do, but it's the reminding I think of, like look, you are leaving a legacy, you do have fruit. Right. Take a minute. Yeah, yeah, yeah and look back.
Speaker 1:Yeah, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's easy to go into shame. Shame, I was like thinking, like, oh, like, and I was just, I was like thinking of certain things you know in my life and I was like, oh, I wonder if anybody was listening to this is like, oh, like, as soon as this topic comes up, they just go right into shame. You know, for all the stuff that they can be like, oh man, I should have done that better, but I just wanted to speak over that. Like, like you said, like I think, like we're always doing some good things and maybe other things we need help on, you know, and so I know it's the same thing. Sometimes, like you know, my kids will write me something like and I'll be like, whoa, you know, like on father's day oh man.
Speaker 1:And I go like, wow, like, thank you Lord, that my kid thinks that number one and that I guess I did do that. Like, thank you God, like you helped me to do that, you know. And then you know, I think too, something like my counselors has said to me on a number of occasions it's like you know what is true biblical leadership. You know Like, because we think we go right to like the dumb kind of worldly things, like they're not dumb but they're actually. But there's other things you know Like they're not dumb but they're actually. But there's other things you know like.
Speaker 1:And my counselor was saying to me the other day like, like, did Jesus lead? Like by going like this is the way it is and we're going to do that and this and our family, it's like, no, he didn't, he was like he led through example and through like he's going this way and people can follow him if they choose to. He's going this way and people can follow him if they choose to. And so it was a more like, a little bit more like relational than dictatorship, definitely. You know, and I think, like we go like if we're not
Speaker 1:careful. We want to jump right to all the things like the you gotta be a provider and you gotta do that, and you've got to lead a Bible study at your own home, like all those things that are like they seem like the right things, and we know you can do those things too, and you know your, your wife, can hate you because you, because you're not doing it with love, right? So, god, help us to lead with love and compassion and, uh, understanding. And how how do we lead our wives? Well, how do we lead our kids?
Speaker 1:Well, like yeah, like ask the Holy spirit to to lead you in those things. You know, I I had a conversation with my wife the other day of something that was like kind of like it was bothering me. I was kind of like nervous about this thing that was coming up and I didn't know what and we were like I think we, I don't know, it was just like neither one of us had we were dancing around it, yeah and I we were talking on the phone.
Speaker 1:I got off the phone and I felt like the Lord was like call her back and bring it up Like don't let it go any farther, you know, and it wasn't anything bad, it was a good thing, but it was just something coming up that we needed. We just never had a conversation about it and we needed to have a conversation about it. And so I was like I was like can I talk to you about this thing? And I said I'm kind of nervous about it. Like I could see, I know this is coming up. We haven't really talked about it, um. And I was just like this is how I feel, you know. And I was like I'm excited about it, I'm nervous about it, I'm scared, I don't know, like all these things. Like I just kind of like said how I felt and I was nervous about the conversation because it was something we were both ducking, you know. And then she was like I am so thankful you brought this up. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And the Lord was like that's leadership. You led her to somewhere where you guys were both afraid to talk about it, but you led her there and then she responded in like a wonderful way and she was super thankful that I took the lead and wasn't even trying. You know what I mean. It wasn't like yo, I'm gonna be a leader and I'm gonna talk. It was like it was like in total humbleness and anyways, and it was awesome and we talked about it and she was so thankful that I brought it up. I got off the phone and I felt like the Lord was like that is leadership.
Speaker 2:Well it's, it's having the courage right To say something Right, right. It's like we a lot of times, as men, we lack courage. Yeah. Right yeah, we lack the intestinal fortitude to actually say something. Yeah. Because we're so nervous about being wrong, about somebody making fun of us. I mean, there's a whole list of it, right? Yeah.
Speaker 2:Everybody deals with this like every day, but it's like if we could find a way to have the courage to just bring something up. You know and it's. I think that's why you know men's groups work, bible studies. You know all of that because it's like by you being strong and leading and saying something about it, somebody else is now encouraged and their spine is straightened. Right.
Speaker 2:Right and they're like, oh well, if he talked about it, you know, and that's. That was that's, I think, probably the backbone of why we've been doing this podcast is to be a conversation starter when, like I mean, we're not really advertising, we're not doing all the things that everybody in the world's doing. Try and get this out in front of people. You know our heart was like Lord.
Speaker 2:You know who needs to get this, and we just want you to put it in those people's hands yeah right and it's like it's to be a conversation starter to have, for us to have courage to talk about the things we're going through daily and monthly and yearly, put them out there for other guys to listen to, to be an encouragement to them to stiffen and straighten their spine to and be like, yeah, you know what, like I can do this, I can talk about this and yeah, you know what, actually I do have areas I need to change it. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And then, like, begin on that journey with the Lord and asking him it's like what? What do I need to change? What do I need to do? Yeah, yeah no-transcript.
Speaker 1:We move forward and sometimes we succeed and sometimes we fail. But yeah, and I think that's why we started the podcast right, Because we want to be like, hey, this is, this is working out our faith with another brother, you know, and yeah, it's great, in a safe space, right For us to be able to to talk about things that are in our heart, right.
Speaker 2:But the thing you and I have I think, one of the biggest things we've probably learned is that it's it's not just a place for me to be able to to talk about everything. Right, it's like I need to be able to receive correction, too. Right, I need to be honest about the things that I'm going through, too right, I need to be honest about the things I'm going through, the things that I'm experiencing, right, the the issues that I'm having areas in my life that I'm messing up right and I don't know how to fix it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, right and then being willing to talk about that with you. And then you know, not just you offering encouragement, but offering correction too yeah right and it's like look there, you need to make an adjustment right here.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm really feeling like that's not the right way to do this or that's not right the right way to think or talk, or yeah you know we've done that for each other like like daily right, I mean for yeah, for years yeah, yeah we're like man, like I'm seeing this right now and I'm like this is what I'm like, picking up on dude, as you're saying that, and maybe give this a shot, and then you go for it and you give it a shot and realize that, dude, that little adjustment helped out so much.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I remember years ago, pastor James McDonald. He said back in the day when we were listening to him all the time, he said you should have at least one guy that you go to and you say, hey, you have complete authority to call me on my BS if I'm doing something wrong, I give you full authority to say and point it out and and tell me why and how I'm messing.
Speaker 1:You know, and I, I just love that and I know, I know we've said that to each other and I actually had another friend recently say that to me like out of the blue. I was like Whoa, that is so cool, you know, and I think I think it's um, and I think it's a huge problem that most men have, because it's like and maybe women, I don't know, but they're like, they're not under anybody's authority, they're like I'm the boss, I do whatever I want and I'm not even open to somebody telling me that I'm doing something wrong. And what's funny is like that is actually like anti-following jesus, because if we're, if that's how we are with other people, how are we even open to the, the holy spirit, telling us we're doing something wrong?
Speaker 2:far more intimate right yeah than in all areas right yeah, I mean you're talking up in your face, up in your business. You know he, he has the ability to get in. Or like we have no desire for him to be in right, right, because we would never let somebody that we don't trust in that far right right yeah, and I think it's a.
Speaker 1:It's also like a human way of practicing being under the holy spirit's leadership, you know, because it's like when another guy tells us like, hey, dude, like I see this thing in your life, it's like number one, we're going to be, we're going to go right to a fence, but that's what the Holy Spirit's doing to us all the time, so it kind of helps, it's like you know, I don't know yeah.
Speaker 2:You have that log in your eye. Let me get the axe real quick. Calls you on your stuff, man.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you know what's crazy I'm thinking too. It's like it's actually a really loving thing to do. It's like I see this guy over here, my friend, and I'm like, oh my gosh, he is rapidly approaching a cliff. I can see it, he can't see it. I love this dude. I don't want this guy to go over the edge, so I'm going to tell him that's so loving, Well it's actually the mercy of God, yeah.
Speaker 2:Right, I mean it's the Holy Spirit showing us how to operate in the mercy of God. Dude, it's like when we do stuff right, we're caught up in something We've believed, a lie. It's twisted and we're just caught up in this thing. Dude, that's just affecting us and everyone around us and it's like then we get found out and then we want to be mad because we got found out.
Speaker 2:But it actually I mean honestly it's- the mercy of god that we got found out yeah because he loves us and others love us enough where they care for our well-being and are willing to call us on our crap, even when we don't want to believe it or can't believe it because we're twisted up. Right, it's, it's him. It's him allowing us to get to that place where you know, or being exposed yeah, you know what I mean you know it's crazy.
Speaker 1:I was thinking like you mean, you know it's crazy. I was thinking like how demonic is that? That when we see somebody who is, you know, doing something they shouldn't do, and we are like we're aware of it and we think like I should say something, that oppression, that is right there is insane.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the oppression right there in that moment is like, bro, you better not say anything, you have no right. You know, like just I don't even know. Do you know? There's like a wall of demonic oppression that comes against you. That's like don't even say that, like you can't say that to that person.
Speaker 2:How dare you Dude?
Speaker 1:Wild right Straight up yeah.
Speaker 2:Straight up. You like, feel it like hardcore, you're like, there's no way I could say that it's like it's when you almost have to go into that thing, that situation, knowing that you're gonna have all 21 guns pointed at you, dude, right, because they're in their defense, right, they're not. They're not going to be able to see that. You're coming at it from the standpoint of love yeah right, and that's really what it is.
Speaker 2:It's like your heart is motivated, or should be motivated, by love. You care for that person. You want to bring things to their attention.
Speaker 2:You know a lot of the times we're we're nervous or scared to do it because you know, we don't know how to maybe present it in a way where it'll be received and I honestly don't know if there is even a way to even do that yeah it's more of just speaking the truth in love yeah right, and then allowing the holy spirit to just take it and do with it what he wants, because you know they initially are going to get mad yeah, you're bringing it up, yeah but it's like it's the mercy of God that you have even got found out. He could have let you continue in your sin or your lie or whatever the situation was, and you could just walk off a cliff. Yeah. But he's trying to get your attention and say, hey, look at, stop. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think like, well, number one, I think I was just thinking, if you're listening to this podcast, I would encourage you to ask the Lord is that something I should do, that I should give a brother that I know you know? Like, let him know, like, hey, because I think, like you have to. The right way to do this is to say to somebody I trust you enough to give you the opportunity to say something to me, like I'm telling you right now I'm giving you an opening with me in my life to where, like, if you see me screwing up, please tell me.
Speaker 1:And once you've given that person that opening, then then they're more freely, you know, like they're more willing to take, to take that opportunity, cause I mean, it is a scary thing, oh for sure you know. So, like, if you're listening, pray about that and ask the Lord, like who should I? And? And be careful, obviously, cause you need to do it with somebody that you really know loves you. And then, on the flip side of this, I don't think that it's something that we have to be careful, like just because we see something in somebody else, we may not have that relationship with them to say this, this is not like a.
Speaker 1:We can't just fire this nuke at everybody like you really have to be friends with the guy, because I could see, you know I mean I think we've all had it maybe some random person comes up and tells us something like and they have no relationship with us, so it's just pain. Yeah, yep, I don't know that this person loves me. All I hear is that they just hit me over the head with a baseball bat right right, and maybe they're right, but we don't have that kind of relationship. Well, there's the truth right, and.
Speaker 2:And then there's the truth in love. Exactly right, there's the truth, right. And then there's the truth in love. Exactly Right, there's the truth. I mean, truth is going to hurt, whether it's in love or not. Right, but it's how it's received. Yeah. Right, right, and I mean, I could bro we could speak truth all day long.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:And just, I mean, we're cutting down trees in a forest. You know what I mean, but if it's not covered in love, right where I'm exuding the heart of the Father, when I'm talking to somebody, like you know, I mean, come on, let's just get real for a second. You know, when somebody is just giving you lip service, dude, versus when somebody's heart is actually engaged in the conversation. Yeah, there's a distinct difference in the way that you feel inside. Yeah, because it hits you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, difference in the way that you feel inside, yeah, because it hits you. Yeah, yeah, I mean I'm thinking of this is we, we've played this out with each other and I'm thinking that, like I remember, you know, like times when you've said something to me and I'm like, like and this is what's interesting instead of like, instead of like me, like breathing out some sort of like response, like, oh, yeah, well, like, you know what I mean Like I go, like, oh, and it's like I go oh, like this is a guy I trust, this is a guy who I know loves me, and he just told me something hard. I better, just, I really need to. You know what I mean. As opposed to, if it was somebody else saying it, I would probably want to attack.
Speaker 1:But we have, you know, you have that connection with another, with another guy. It's like spiritually, and you know this person cares for you. You're just it, it. It's like, even though it hurts, like your defenses go down, yeah, and if you don't have the relationship with somebody, you're, your defenses are going to go up like, yeah, you just attacked me. You know, like, because you don't trust the person, or you know you don't have that relationship. But yeah, I was thinking like when you've said things to me, I just kind of go like it's sort of like you know, it's like yeah, you're right like, oh, shoot, you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, but it's a beautiful thing, well, and we've bombed.
Speaker 2:We've bombed plenty of times too, with each other too, where we've maybe haven't said it quite as much in love as we need to, or we're a little bit more pointed than necessary, and but because of that relationship it's twofold yeah then grace now operates yeah right, because you're like, that was really harsh how he said that yeah but because we have a relationship, I can do one of two things, or both right, I can either do the same thing and take what you said and consider it right, or I can do that and also tell you like hey, bro, that was a little rough man like yeah, I hear what you're saying, right you know, and if you really think there's something there like I'll, I'll take a look and I'll see yeah right, but it was just.
Speaker 2:It just came across a little rough yeah and kind of hurt my feelings a little bit yeah right.
Speaker 2:I mean, we even had a situation I don't have to go into details, but we even had a situation, like months ago, where it was something like that and it was the way that I had responded, where I was distracted, right, and I wasn't really fully paying attention to what was being talked about, and said something, and it was a little pointed and insensitive, and you had gotten quiet for a couple days and then I came. I came a couple days later, I saw you in the office and I was like, hey, what's up, man, are you okay?
Speaker 2:and I, I think I began to apologize to you for the way that I said what I said and you just kind of looked at me and you were like, yeah, that really kind of hurt my feelings, right yeah and that for me was confirmation, like okay, yeah, that's, I need to work on that area, because I was a little, I was a little harsh, right, because when you're really good friends too, it's like your defenses are down too. It's like, and you're you're a little you're way more free with each other, right you know, because inside you're thinking like shut up, dude, just take it on the chin like
Speaker 2:what like stop being a girl, yeah right, or whatever, and it's, but this wasn't one of those situations to do that. This wasn't that. It was a serious thing, dude, and it was. You know their emotions tied to it and everything and it wasn't a time to be funny. You know it was, you know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's funny.
Speaker 2:But as an example right yeah.
Speaker 1:You want to know what's awesome. I don't even remember what it was Like, that's and that's, that's, but that's the love, that's the love of God and the love of friendship and the love of forgiveness. It's like I, I don't, I promise you, I I sort of remember, like the idea of this, but I don't remember what the offense was, which is actually really cool Like yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:It's love covers the multitude of sins. Yeah, yeah, for sure no, I, I only remember because it's it's it was. It was enough of us of what was going on in the situation to leave a lasting memory for me, because it was one of those milestones where it's like the lord was dealing with me and how to how to take care of it the right way to talk yeah I need to go back, I need to apologize and repent and say look, man, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:You know it was a learning thing for me, so it's stuck in there.
Speaker 1:That's cool, that's awesome. Yeah. And that's friendship, right? Yeah, that's true friendship. We're like uh-oh, maybe I stepped over a line, but then we go fix it and you know, like whatever. But yeah line and. But then we go fix it and you know, like whatever, but yeah, what's the matter with you. Yeah, that's awesome acrocomand I know I was like bro you punched me in the nuts and I didn't know I needed to have my guard on.
Speaker 1:we might need to edit that. I didn't wear my cup to work today, sorry, and on that note. On that note, we better pray. Jesus help us. We better go forward on Sunday. That's a bad joke right there. Woo, I just got dizzy.
Speaker 2:We'll edit that one out. Maybe we could just beep it.
Speaker 1:Like we've never had a beep before, like that'd be cool that would be really cool.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm going to beep it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah, just for fun, or guys.
Speaker 2:Just for funsies. You've got to have the little bit of risque, dude right. I mean we don't honestly think any girl would listen to this. Anyways, locker room, but it's really close.
Speaker 1:It's super close oh man, this has been great yeah, I know this has been great yeah, once you um, once you praise out sweet lord, thanks for today, thanks for um just giving us a some time to um get into your word, into just discussing these things, lord, into learning how to become better men and strong and courageous. And just, lord, bless everybody who's listened today. Give them courage to follow you, give them courage to be under your authority and to find friends who they can walk with through life that will encourage them, lead them, correct them and just push them forward, lord, into following you. And Lord, we just pray a blessing over everybody's family who's listening, and just their work, their relationships. Just give them joy today, lord, fill them with your Holy Spirit and give us all joy In Jesus' name, amen, amen.